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What Is Empathy?
Reprinted with permission from Greater Good, the online magazine of UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center.
 

The term “empathy” is used to describe a wide range of experiences. Emotion researchers generally define empathy as the ability to sense other people's emotions, coupled with the ability to imagine what someone else might be thinking or feeling.
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Empathy lies in our
ability to be present
without opinion.

When we sense ourselves being defensive or unable to empathize, we need to (a) stop, breathe, give ourselves empathy,
(b) express nonviolently,
or (c) take time out.

Our ability to offer empathy can allow us to stay vulnerable, defuse potential violence, help us hear the word 'no' without taking it as a rejection, revive lifeless conversation, and even hear the feelings and needs expressed through silence.

 
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What Is Empathy? ...continued

Contemporary researchers often differentiate between two types of empathy:

“Affective empathy” refers to the sensations and feelings we get in response to others' emotions; this can include mirroring what that person is feeling, or just feeling stressed when we detect another's fear or anxiety.

“Cognitive empathy,” sometimes called “perspective taking,” refers to our ability to identify and understand other peoples  ' emotions. Studies suggest that people with autism spectrum disorders have a hard time empathizing.

Empathy seems to have deep roots in our brains and bodies, and in our evolutionary history. Elementary forms of empathy have been observed in our primate relatives, in dogs, and even in rats.

Empathy has been associated with two different pathways in the brain, and scientists have speculated that some aspects of empathy can be traced to mirror neurons, cells in the brain that fire when we observe someone else perform an action in much the same way that they would fire if we performed that action ourselves.

Research has also uncovered evidence of a genetic basis to empathy, though studies suggest that people can enhance (or restrict) their natural empathic abilities.

Having empathy doesn't necessarily mean we'll want to help someone in need, though it's often a vital first step toward compassionate action.

For more: Read Frans de Waal's essay on “The Evolution of Empathy” and Daniel Goleman's overview of different forms of empathy, drawing on the work of Paul Ekman.

Why Practice Empathy?
Empathy is a building block of morality—for people to follow the Golden Rule, it helps if they can put themselves in someone else's shoes. It is also a key ingredient of successful relationships because it helps us understand the perspectives, needs, and intentions of others. Here are some of the ways that research has testified to the far-reaching importance of empathy.

For more: Consider the dark sides to empathy: Some argue that sociopaths can use empathy to help them exploit or even torture people, and caregivers risk feeling emotionally overwhelmed if they can't regulate their empathy.

How to Cultivate Empathy?
Humans experience affective empathy from infancy, physically sensing their caregivers' emotions and often mirroring those emotions. Cognitive empathy emerges later in development, around three to four years of age, roughly when children start to develop an elementary “theory of mind”—that is, the understanding that other people experience the world differently than they do.

From these early forms of empathy, research suggests we can develop more complex forms that go a long way toward improving our relationships and the world around us. Here are some of the best research-based practices for nurturing empathy in ourselves and others.

  • Focus your attention outwards: Being mindfully aware of your surroundings, especially the behaviors and expressions of other people, is crucial for empathy. Indeed, research suggests practicing mindfulness helps us take the perspectives of other people yet not feel overwhelmed when we encounter their negative emotions.

  • Get out of your own head: Research shows we can increase our own level of empathy by actively imagining what someone else might be experiencing.

  • Don't jump to conclusions about others: We feel less empathy when we assume that people suffering are somehow getting what they deserve.

  • Meditate: Neuroscience research by Richard Davidson and his colleagues suggests that meditation—specifically loving-kindness meditation, which focuses attention on concern for others—might increase the capacity for empathy among short-term and long-term meditators alike (though especially among long-time meditators).

  • Explore imaginary worlds: Research by Keith Oatley and colleagues has found that people who read fiction are more attuned to others' emotions and intentions.

  • Join the band: Recent studies have shown that playing music together boosts empathy in kids.

  • Play games: Neuroscience research suggests that when we compete against others, our brains are making a “mental model” of the other person's thoughts and intentions.

  • Study facial expressions: Pioneering research by Paul Ekman has found we can improve our ability to identify other people's emotions by systematically studying facial expressions. Take our Emotional Intelligence Quiz for a primer, or check out Ekman's F.A.C.E. program for more rigorous training.

  • Describe Emotions: Consider researcher John Medina‘s two steps for developing an “Empathy Reflex” toward your romantic partner: Describe the emotions you think you're seeing in your partner and try to imagine what might be motivating those emotions (taking care to reply to your partner with “I” statements).

  • Practice NVC: Similarly, some research, including a study among male parolees enrolled in a substance abuse treatment program, has suggested that the practice of Nonviolent Communication (NVC) can boost empathy.

  • Take lessons from babies: Mary Gordon's Roots of Empathy program is designed to boost empathy by bringing babies into classrooms, stimulating children's basic instincts to resonate with others' emotions.

  • Combat inequality: Research has shown that attaining higher socioeconomic status diminishes empathy, perhaps because people of high SES have less of a need to connect with, rely on, or cooperate with others. As the gap widens between the haves and have-nots, we risk facing an empathy gap as well. This doesn't mean money is evil, but if you have a lot of it, you might need to be more intentional about maintaining your own empathy toward others.

For more: The Ashoka Foundation's Start Empathy initiative tracks educators' best practices for teaching empathy. The initiative gave awards to 14 programs judged to do the best job at educating for empathy. The nonprofit Playworks also offers eight strategies for developing empathy in children.

How Empathic Are You?
Take the GGSC's emotional intelligence quiz to find out!
Researchers use the Interpersonal Reactivity Index to measure empathy, though some question its accuracy as an empathy measurement tool. Download it and try for yourself.

 

This article originally appeared on Greater Good, the online magazine of UC Berkeley's Greater Good Science Center. To view the original article, click here. Used here by permission.

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New eBook Titles ...continued

A Helping Hand eBook by Liv Larsson

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Learn to successfully help other people solve their conflicts without getting sucked in yourself with this very down-to-earth approach to mediation, whether you are a parent, teacher, business manager, counselor or peace worker. (Kindle, PDF & EPUB)

IS IT POSSIBLE TO HELP OTHER PEOPLE SOLVE THEIR CONFLICTS WITHOUT GETTING SUCKED IN YOURSELF?

YES! And there is a specific set of skills which makes it much more likely that your efforts will be successful. This book teaches you step by step how to become an effective mediator. Add practice, practice, practice (and some self-reflection) and you will soon celebrate your first successes in helping people to connect, whether you are a parent, teacher, business manager, counselor or peace worker.

Apart from that, you will get a good foundation in Marshall Rosenberg's Nonviolent Communication (NVC), on which this very down-to-earth approach to mediation is based upon. You will also get lots of answers to practical questions.

Take the chance to learn mediation from Liv Larsson, an experienced trainer who has taught peacemakers in violent conflicts in Thailand and Sri Lanka (and to many others western countries) and who applies the very same skills to solve conflicts in her family!

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This booklet will help you evaluate, repair, and nurture the relationships that you want to see flower. Learn how to define the relationship you want and then what to do to get it.

WHAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR YOUR RELATIONSHIP?

The most important of all questions in this book might be that one about how you want your relationships to be. If your answer to that question is clear, it will be much easier to know how to act and what to request of the other. All the relationship tools in the world become redundant if you do not know what you want to use them for.

Your positive attitude will make it easier to stand challenges but will not take you to the goal. This booklet will help you evaluate, repair, and nurture the relationships that you want to see flower.

 

 

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